In My Write Mind
**Soundtrack: Start Turning Me On, New Edition, One Love**
It's a long weekend. I need this. And I plan on enjoying it to the fullest. So whatever you all do, be safe and be happy. And please...vote for your er, favorite, on Tickle's blog. It's the People's Choice!!! LOL
Now on to the Things...
1. OK. So I FINALLY got to see the Surreal Life last night. Holy crap!!! This...will be the greatest season ever. In the first episode alone I saw more blurry screens than on BET: UnCut shows in a month. TWO ditzy models, a female pro wrestler, a former rock star (well, almost. I'm sorry, but the only thing I remember about the Go-Go's is the Wham! song where George Michael told somebody to wake him up before they go-go...no.clue.), DA BRAT?!?!?!?!?, one former BRADY and last and, in height, definitely least...Mini Me. BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
I swear, whichever VH1 employee convinced Verne Troyer's agent to have him appear on this season not only deserves a raise, they should be given the run of the network. Stroke of genius. Sure, they got lucky last year with the whole Flavor Flav-Brigette Nielsen craziness, but if you think about it, they REALLY got lucky. Imagine if that situation went in the entirely opposite direction. I mean, what if Flavor wasn't enamored with the blond amazon? What if he actually paid more attention to the fact that his roommates hated him and in turn, tried to kill them? It would've been the start of another prison sentence for the troubled rapper, thus changing the name of that season from "The Surreal Life" to "The Very Real 25 to Life". The end of the show. And somebody would've gotten fired for putting him on there.
But as it turns out, everything worked out peachy. Flav and Brig have their own spinoff series (from a REALITY SHOW!!!! funny stuff), the employee that hired Flav is most likely responsible for Troyer's hiring, and the Surreal franchise is in rarified air. At its absolute zenith right now. Seriously, what they got wrong with a pudgy, brooding Emmanuel Lewis in Season 2, they got totally right this season.
See Verne ride his scooter at all times. See Verne pass out at the pool after ONE CAN OF BEER! See Verne pee. While riding the scooter into a wall. BUCKET NEKKED!!!!
Awww man, I'm cryin over here. This is the funniest TV since Fox gave Magic a talk show. Trust me on this. Unintentional comedy will ensue week after week as long as MiniMe is involved. I cannot wait.
2. I'm reading a book entitled The Known World by Edward P. Jones. I will let you all know how that goes. I have A LOT of travel coming up and will be reading it on flights to and fro.
3. After reading what I wrote in Thing #1 about the Surreal Life, I got to realizing that where I work is just like that show...we attract B-level celebs. LOL I think back to our major fundraising event last year, and who in da hell was on the stage? A potential Surreal cast, that's who. Here is the list of "stars" we trotted out: Cheryl "Salt" James, ChristopHer "Play" Martin, A.C. (the A.C. stands for A'm Celibate...lol) Green, and Raz B. (FREAKIN RAZ B!!!!!! OF B2K!!!!). Sure, Patti was there as well, and S. Epatha Merkerson of Law & Order. But man oh man...we were one Brady away from poplulating a house in Southern California. With this cast of characters, how are we supposed to raise any money? We had to PAY THEM to come. Lawd, we were lucky to appear in Jet magazine. We gotta do better. Sigh.
4. A few people have inquired about who my crush is. As far as the blog crush goes, I ain't telling. But I will tell you who I've had a crush on since the first day I laid eyes on her--Tweet. Good LAWDDDD!!! Put some Tweet on and I will do anything you want. She is the standard for sexy, as far as I'm concerned. I caught her new video yesterday (Turn Da Lights Off), and once again, she brought it.
Quick story: A few years ago, I was hanging out at Justin's here in NYC and my boy said, there's one more place we have to go before we leave the city. I was down; didn't have any other plans. So we go to this club a few blocks down from Justin's, head inside and WTF?!?!?! We were at TWEET'S BIRTHDAY PARTY!!! I damn near peed my pants. Missy was there, her dancers, and a gang of people that you would know if you saw them. All of them were upstairs in V.I.P. looking down on the rest of us while dancing wildly. I spotted Tweet and her sexy ass. Could I meet her? I'm Will Dawson, Bitch! Which, when translated means...probably not. LOL
I grew up with Missy's dancers in St. Albans. So when I saw them, of course I asked for the hook up to V.I.P. Since they'd been there and got a head start on the alcohol, they gave me the boozed-induced "you must be jokin'" face. LOL "Even WE can't go up there right now. Too many heads." So there went MeetTweet Plan A.
MTPlan B (always gotta have a back-up) was to wait til they were leaving the club and get one of the dancers to introduce me. So then it happened. We all went outside, me with the dancers, Missy and Tweet and their security ahead of us. I pick up my pace, meet Tweet at her car, and my friend introduces me. I said hello, happy birthday, and then, all I could do was smile. No questions, no comments...just me cheesin in front of the birthday girl. The rest is a blur. But I do remember this: Her slanted, deep, dark eyes, her cocoa complexion, her broad smile and perfect lips--simply beautiful.
So if you wanna know who my crush is, there ya go. It's Tweet. Hands down. Thanks for coming. Tip your blog-waitress!!! LOL
5. I'm headed to the ATL this weekend. Gonna kick back and relax a little bit, take in the sights on MLK weekend. The next time I come out that way, I propose we have an ATL Blogger Meet n' Greet. Somewhere cool. My ATL bloggers, let's make this happen. LOL
And in the words of the ensemble who got together for the MLK tribute song, Holiday:
"We thank him for teaching us that we all have the strength to love. Here's to the prince of non-violence for showing us the way. Dr. King tried to love somebody...do you wanna love somebody? And for his sake, on the holiday, take a day...take a day to love somebody. Don't play on the holiday, work to find a better way...everybody love somebody. Everybody sing...for Martin Luther King. Let freedom ring...for Martin Luther King!"
Ahhh, the Fat Boys, pre-Bobby Whitney, Kurtis Blow, Teena Marie, Stephanie Mills and Stacy Lattisaw...those were the days.
Enjoy your weekend!!!
scribbled by Will at 1/14/2005 03:30:00 PM
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I write entirely to find out what I'm thinking, what I'm looking at, what I see and what it means. What I want and what I fear. (Joan Didion)
The Write One
Will. Lefty. Since Summer 1971. Over the next six months, I'll be saying some hellos, some goodbyes. Living, laughing, growing. Don't.miss.a.word.
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