In My Write Mind
12.29.2004

A Weird Wednesday 5 Things...

***Soundtrack: "Born to Lose," Ray Charles, RAY Original Soundtrack***

It's been a weird day. Seriously. Not just because it's 50 degrees outside a few days after it was -50 with wind. Not just because the year is just about over and end of year just doesn't seem the same without my dad around.

No, today isn't weird just because of those things. Please don't get me wrong--I truly am grateful for a lot this year: my family, of course; my health; my new writing gigs that keep me busier than I ever thought I'd be; my friendships; and of course, my semi-daily blog.

The following are five things that are on my mind as I type this, in no particular order. These things are adding to the weirdness of the day. Sigh.

1. My co-worker. "Happy Holidays! And be safe." Followed by a kiss on the cheek, those were the last words I spoke to her as she left the office on December 3 to embark on a month-long trip to India and Sri Lanka, among other points along the way. She is due back in the States on January 3, and while I don't know if the tsunami that affected so many lives has affected her directly, I just feel weird. And I probably won't stop feeling that way until I know that she's safe. And if I make errors during this post, it's due to my fingers being crossed tightly until I get news of her return.

2. My computer. Not having one at my constant disposal is killing me. Seriously. I took it in for repairs over a week ago...and still don't have it back. It's been weird without it, to say the least. Dude, I'm gettin a Dell. Sigh.

3. My mom. I know that each and every holiday has been somewhat empty for her. Hell, every DAY has been that way for the past four months. And I can't help but feel powerless because I know that there's nothing I can say or do to fill that void, to make the holidays and the everydays whole again for her. The whole holiday thing has been weird this year.

4. My job. There's a new director coming in to handle the black college responsibilities. It's a job I really didn't want because I was already wearing three hats here, what with working with the HBCUs AND writing for two magazines. But now another new person is coming in January 10 and lawd knows what "philosophies" he will have up his sleeve. I need to start looking for a new job, spread my wings and fly. For real. It's been six years here. Longer than I've stayed at any job. And that leaves me feeling a weird kind of "comfortable." I usually don't do "comfortable." Might be time to shake things up. Take some chances. Stay tuned...

5. My New Year's. For the first time in years, I have no date for New Year's. No one to ring in 2005 with, no one to watch the Times Square ball drop with, no one to toast, no one to kiss. And really, it's not that I'm dreading it. However, it will be a new experience. One that will leave me feeling different. Alone, but not lonely. And well, weird...

**Rest in peace, Jerry Orbach. And all of those souls literally washed away on the other side of the world. My heart goes out to the families.**

Goodbye, 2004.


scribbled by Will at 12/29/2004 05:20:00 PM
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12.21.2004

Sneaking In, Speaking Up...

OK...my PC has been down for the past few days so I haven't been able to blog AT ALL. And I'm going a little stir crazy. So I'm sitting here at my boy Jeff's house on his laptop, reading blogs and, as you can see below, copying from my blogger friend and fellow New Yorker Singing once again...LOL

I have so much to blog about and promise that I will be up and at em as soon as my PC decides to act right. Until then, please enjoy the holidays and stay safe wherever you may be.

**this is me raising a glass to all bloggers I've come to know** RESPECT!!!

Last person that....

x. Slept in your bed: me
x. Saw you cry: me.
x. Made you cry: Antwone Fisher
x. You shared a drink with: my co-workers at the holiday party on Monday
x. You went to the movies with: my friend Karen (Ocean's Twelve)
x. You went to the mall with: What's a mall?
x. Yelled at you: my teammate after a bad pass
x. Sent you an email: the 41 year old that tried to take me home from the club on Friday...lol
x. You kissed: Never kiss and tell

HAVE YOU EVER...

x. Said "I Love You" and meant it? yes
x. Gotten in a fight with your pet: no, although I wanted to choke Oreo last week.
x. Been to California: yes, LA, San Diego, San Fran, Oakland...I love Cali.
x. Been to Hawaii: no.
x. Been to Mexico: yes
x. Been to China: no
x. Been to Canada: yes...Toronto
x. Danced naked: no
x. Dreamed something really crazy and then it happened the next day?: yes
x. Wish you were the opposite sex: hellus nous
x. Had an imaginary friend: no, although I did pretend to be announcing NBA games by myself up in my room when I was little
x. Do you have a crush on someone: Yes and its a fellow blogger, too
x. What book are you reading now: The Biography of Jackie Robinson
x. Worst feeling in the world: not being able to help friends in need
x. Future son's name: William, Jr.
x. Do you sleep with a stuffed animal: hellus nous.
x. What's under your bed: cobwebs, dust...
x. Favorite sport to watch: football, basketball
x. Piercings/tattoos: no
x. Boyfriend/Girlfriend: I don't know what the hell to call what I have......i guess friends....

EXTRA STUFF...

x. Do you do drugs: Never....although I do catch contact highs on occasion.
x. Do you drink: Sure do.
x. What are you most scared of: Nick Ashford as a mime
x. What clothes do you sleep in: boxers and a smile
x. Where do you want to get married: Hawaii would be a great spot
x. Who do you really hate: I don't hate people...but I will stop messing with ppl in a minute
x. Been in Love: Yes
x. Do you like being around people: Sometimes.
x. Are you for world peace: Yes
x. Have you ever liked someone you had no chance with: Yes, many times.
x. Do you have a "type" of person you always go after: not really...I love ALL types of black sistas
x. Are you lonely right now: no
x. Song thats stuck in your head a lot: Lovers and Friends
x. Do you want to get married: yes.
x. Do you want kids: yes, 2 would be nice.

FAVORITE...

x. Room in house: my bedroom
x. Type(s) of music: R&B
x. Color(s): orange
x. Perfume or cologne?: cologne
x. Month(s): August
x. Stone: Onyx

IN THE LAST 72 HOURS, HAVE YOU...

x. Cried: no
x. Bought something: yes...just got some sneakers from the Nike outlet
x. Gotten sick: yes.....my head is clogged as I type
x. Sang: Sure...not well, though
x. Wanted to tell someone you loved them: yes
x. Met someone new: yes
x. Missed someone: yes
x. Hugged someone: yes
x. Kissed someone: there's that kiss and tell thing again...hehehe

scribbled by Will at 12/21/2004 07:23:00 PM
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12.16.2004

'Desperate' For More...

Sigh. OK, let me just get this out of the way. For all those who will be visiting my blog for the first time and reading the information below, I AM a male. And probably one of the few males that watch ABC's runaway hit, Desperate Housewives. In fact, I'm hooked. Sundays at 9, my TiVo is set. The ONLY reason I don't watch it live is because The Wire comes on at the same time. And with no commercials. You do the math.

Why do I watch? I don't really know. Probably for the same reason I watch The West Wing or NYPD Blue or The Practice or even LOST. For one, I guess I like one-hour dramas. And two, I love well-written shows. Shows that allow you to follow characters with flaws, shows that bring you surprises and aren't afraid to do the 'shock and awe' thing.

For my money, 'Desperate' came along at the perfect time and perfect night: television was inundated (SAT word...lol) with reality and faux-reality shows that were boring, crude, unbelievable or just plain disgusting (that's right, Fear Factor--it's you I'm thinking of). Some of the above-mentioned shows were getting long in the tooth, with surprises coming few and far between and characters becoming mundane yet comfortable, like an old couch.

Then came this show. Filled with people are familiar, with most of the 'Housewives' already appearing in different shows throughout the years. So it wasn't like getting to know a stranger. We KNOW these women. And plus, how can you not at least check out a show that has the word Desperate in the title? The title alone begs the questions, Desperate about what? How desperate are they? What will they do to cure their desperation?

With all the intrigue surrounding it (not to mention the unending hype and ads touting it), I figured I would check it out.

Now, now fellas, before you take away my "Manhood" card (although that was probably revoked as soon as I cried during Antwone "Who Will Cry For Da Little Boy" Fisher--the first 12 times), you gotta check this show out. Desperate has a good pace, voice-over narration that doesn't get in the way of the story, and more dark twists and turns than the Jackie Robinson Parkway at night.

It stars Teri Hatcher (Lois and Clark), Marcia Cross (Melrose Place), Felicity Huffman (SportsNight), Nicolette Sheridan (Knots Landing) and Eva Longoria (Young and the Restless). See? All of them were on shows that people can relate to. Familiar. And that's the foundation of the show's fan base. Personally, I watched Lois and Clark for a few seasons and loved Huffman in SportsNight. So that's what drew me.

OK, on to the show.

Here's how ABC describes the show on its web site:

A primetime soap with a truly contemporary take on "happily every after," this new hour- long drama takes a darkly comedic look at suburbia, where the secret lives of housewives aren't always what they seem.

WHAT?!?!? I love it already. Let's read on for a synopsis of the characters mentioned above, shall we?

There's Susan Mayer (Hatcher), the divorcee and single mom who will go to extraordinary lengths for love; Lynette Scavo (Huffman), the ex-career woman who traded the boardroom for boredom, mixed with moments of sheer panic as the mother of four unmanageable kids; Bree Van De Kamp (Cross), the Martha Stewart on steroids, whose family is about to mutiny; and Gabrielle Solis (Longoria), the ex-model with everything she's every wanted -- a rich husband, a big house -- so what is she doing with John, the 17-year-old gardener (Jesse Metcalfe)? And there are her neighbors, including serial divorcee Edie Britt (Sheridan), whose romantic conquests have everyone buzzing.

So we have one desperate romantic, one desperately overworked mom, one desperate perfectionist, one desperate for affection and one who's just plain deseperate. People, I think we have a series here!!!

And during the first nine episodes, there's been all sorts of action in 'suburbia'. Peep this: two people have died, one is in a coma, one kid is sleeping with a married woman, another kid was locked up in a mental institution by his own father, and yet another kid has had his mother drive him to smoking pot. Not since the days of DYNASTY has ABC had this type of drama in prime time.


Here's a quick recap as we head into Week 10 and the inevitable holiday break: In the pilot episode, Mary Alice Young killed herself before the credits even rolled, leaving her fellow housewives shocked and searching for answers why. While putting her belongings in order, they find a note that threatened Mary Alice, saying I KNOW WHAT YOU DID. I'M GOING TO TELL.

(This just in: I went browsing the Desperate message board, and was pleased to find that THERE ARE OTHER STRAIGHT GUYS BESIDES MYSELF THAT WATCH THE SHOW!!! THANK GOD!!!! Ummm, not that there's anything wrong with NON-straight guys watching...*whistling, doing the moonwalk outta this here side note*)

The end of the first episode sees Mary Alice's husband Paul digging up their pool and burying a chest. WTF?!?!? THAT was the tease for the next week. So now...we have a suicide and a potential cover-up. And that note. **TiVo SET!** The next week's show has the women further fleshing out their characters, with Longoria establishing herself as the pivotal one--you either love her (guys) or hate her (women). And women won't hate her because she's beautiful; they'll hate her because she's sleeping with a teenager. **I may have to go to therapy to deal with my envy of that boy. LOL**
We see Huffman with her three rambunctious boys and say a prayer for her. LOL We see Cross in all her Martha Stewart splendor, driving her family crazy with the sheer pretentiousness of it all. Her husband finally snaps and they try counseling. We see Hatcher chasing the new guy on Wisteria Lane--Mike. He's a plumber, or so we think. Until we get a peek onto one of his shelves and see a wad a cash fatter than Beyonce's booty. Another WTF moment. And THAT'S the teaser for the following week.
Keeping track, that's a suicide, a note, a cover-up and now a new guy who's not what he says??? Oh, and did we mention that Hatcher accidentally sets fire to Sheridan's house?!?!? Come onnnnn, Sunday night. LOL

So, there you have the first few weeks. Action-packed, with a thick air of mystery hovering over the block. THE BLOCK IS HOT!!! LOL
Recently, Mrs. Huber--the nosy neighbor who took Sheridan in after the house burnt down, blackmailed Hatcher after she found out she was the accidental arsonist--was exposed as the one who sent the threatening note to Mary Alice. Her husband, Paul, killed her with a blender. He will from now on be referred to as Hammer, since he PUT HER IN THE MIX!!! LOL
He's also the one who put his son in the mental institution for fear that he would spill his guts about another family secret. The secret turned out to be that the Youngs had another child, Dana, that died soon after her birth. It's still unclear as to how the child died, but obviously Hammer doesn't want anyone to know. So off the kid went (after beating up his dad, thus hammering Hammer...hehehe) The kid has now escaped the institution and is now staying in Hatcher's house, unbeknownst to her, and has started to spill about his sibling's accidental death.

Speaking of Hatcher, she found the wad of money in Mike's house while she was there waiting for a delivery. She got busted with the cash and Mike threw her out. We also found out a little about why Mike was there when his employer's daughter came to visit. Turns out he's really there on a mission, although one that hasn't been revealed.

Huffman, who used to be a corporate exec, is overwhelmed with the responsibility of running around after her hyper kids, and resorted to taking ADD medication to keep her alert. Addiction soon followed, as did thoughts of suicide. But instead of taking her life, she's ceased taking the pills and decided to hire a nanny instead.

Longoria was busted having sex with the teenager twice--once by a little girl that lived next door, and once by her visiting mother-in-law, who peeped her game and actually took incriminating photos of the two--in the bedroom, no less. Well, this is where it got sticky. The mother-in-law, while running out with the film, got hit by a car and is now in a coma. The mother of the teenager found out about the affair when Longoria was forced to confess. The cops came to her house soon after, and as Longoria was about to confess her infidelity to her husband, he wound up being arrested instead for illegal activity.

The car that hit the mother-in-law belonged to Cross' son, who was driving recklessly in the vehicle that his father bought him to compensate for his not being around due to him and Cross' separation. He had no remorse for his hitting the pedestrian, claiming that "she was old, she lived her life. What am I going to do for a car now?" LOL This...did not sit well with his mother, of course. She wanted to see repentance. NOPE!
Turns out the boy has a little "mary jane" problem; one that was snuffed out by his mother and dismissed by his father. Cross, who we already know is a bit much, set her son up for failure last week when she gave the coach of the swimming team an anonymous heads up about the pot in her own son's locker. He was promptly discharged from the team. Yeah. Shirley Partridge, she's not.

Sheridan has proven thus far to be nothing but a nuisance, getting in the way of Hatcher and Mike on more than one occasion, but not much else.

The trunk that was buried in the pilot episode was found last week. With a skeleton inside. Chopped up. Gulp.
Here are the set-up questions for the rest of the season: Who's body was it in the trunk? What will happen to Longoria now that her husband is in jail and her secret affair is exposed? What will Cross do with her wayward son? Will he ever confess to the hit-and-run? Will Hammer find his son, and if so, will he get beat up by him again? LOL What will happen with Hatcher and Mike? Why is Mike really there? And do the words "Nanny-Cam" mean anything to you?

Whew. There's a lot going on over there on Wisteria Lane. And its only been NINE EPISODES!!!! There's 13 more coming up over the next five months. Take time to get caught up if you must. Hopefully, this long ass post helped you a little bit. LOL

Either way, there are a lot worse ways to spend your Sunday nights. ABC has a hit on its hands, a soap opera with equal parts mystery, comedy and action. What else can you ask for? Me? Not much. In fact, since its inception, these 'Housewives' have had me hooked. Yup, and dare I say 'desperate' for more.

I will now go take a nap. My...fingers...hurt.



scribbled by Will at 12/16/2004 01:59:00 PM
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12.13.2004

The "Life of Leisure" B12...

By now, you guys know the drill. I'm gonna try and post a Baker's Dozen every Monday I am on vacation. Which means I'll be doing it for the next THREE WEEKS!!!! Take THAT, Yolie! Wooo Hooo!!! LOL

Here we go...

1. "Happy Birthday!!!"--Me to my friend Karen on Friday when she arrived at my house in anticipation of us having dinner at a Thai restaurant in Harlem.

2. "He CAN'T SING!!!"--Karen to me when I kiddingly told her that I arranged for the older man singing to serenade her with MISTY (inside the restaurant where we ended up in lieu of the Thai place). No, I really didn't get him to sing it. And yeah, she wasn't pleased with his rendition. LOL

3. "Stupid dog..."--Me to Oreo, the mutt I'm 'dog-sitting' while my friend is away on vacation in Aruba. Turns out Oreo, who is FIVE, decided to "not be housebroken" before I go to him Saturday morning. Grrrr...

4. "Hey cowboy, what are you hunting?"--Alleged comments made by Mrs. Kob.e Br.yant to Kar.l Malo.ne at a recent Los Angeles Lakers game.

5. "I'm hunting for little Mexican girls."--Malone's response to the question, referring to Bryant's wife and thus sparking yet another fued involving Kobe and a teammate. This is better than Passions. LOL

6. "Hello, Mrs. Diaz..."--Danny Ocean (George Clooney), on the phone with his wife Tess (Julia Roberts) in the movie O.cean's Twel.ve. (Aside: If you thought Eleven was great, Twelve is just good. Which is not bad. At all.)

7. "I've come to be all I can be...because I've been what I've been and it hasn't paid too well."--Anton (character played by Dam.on Wa.yans) at the Army recruitment center in a skit from In Living Color. Yes, I'm still watching the second season on DVD. LOL)

8. "Bowling?!?!? You brought me bowling on my birthday?!?!?"--Karen to me on Sunday night after I told her that we went all the way to Westbury, Long Island to bowl. (Again, she wasn't pleased.)

9. "Oh My GOD!!!"--Karen, after realizing that bowling wasn't the agenda after all as we entered the Westbury Music Fair to see BoyzIIMen.

10. "I'd smoke weed, too, if I had you for a mother!"--Rex Van De Kamp to his wife Bree, on Desperate Housewives, after proclaiming that he's no longer scared of her and that it was OK for his son to smoke a little "doobie", saying it probably was because of Bree's overbearing personality. (Whew, that was a lot to type...LOL)

11. "Shit, murder ain't no thing, but this here is some assassination shit."--Slim Charles to Stringer Bell on The Wire, after Bell asks that he wipe out a state senator who played String for a quarter million dollars. (For those who love this show and didn't see it last night, please check it On Demand. You don't want to miss this episode...or next week's--the season finale.)

12. "Woof!"--Oreo, the dog in need of Depends. Lawd, it's gonna be a long week with this mutt. Sigh.

13. At the Boyz II Men show. Did you know that they've been around for FIFTEEN YEARS?!?!? I will now grab my cane. And that they're a trio now? No more Mike McCary. They still sounded good.


scribbled by Will at 12/13/2004 05:56:00 PM
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12.10.2004

Check Threes Out...

I'm bored today...no inspiration to continue my DVD list just yet. Sigh.

Copied this from Singing, who copied it from someone else...LOL

Here we go...

THREE NAMES YOU GO BY:1. Will 2. Biscuit 3. YesLawd
THREE SCREEN NAMES YOU HAVE HAD:1. Will_NYC 2. YesLawd 3. WetBiscuit (don't ask)
THREE THINGS YOU LIKE ABOUT YOURSELF:1. My sense of humor 2. My crooked smile 3. My eyes
THREE THINGS YOU HATE/DISLIKE ABOUT YOURSELF:1. My crooked nose 2. Procrastinator 3. Can't sing...lol
THREE PARTS OF YOUR HERITAGE:1. African-American 2. Irish 3. (that's all I got...lol)
THREE THINGS THAT SCARE YOU:1. Nick Ashford 1a. Performance mimes 3. Fire
THREE OF YOUR EVERYDAY ESSENTIALS:1. Computer 2. Shower 3. Music
THREE THINGS YOU ARE WEARING RIGHT NOW:1. Orange shirt 2. Tag H.euer watch 3. Timb.erland shoes
THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE BANDS (or artists(at the moment)):1. Jill Scott 2. John Legend 3. Fantasia
THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE SONGS AT PRESENT:1. My Petition, Jilly 2. Truth Is, Fantasia 3. I Changed My Mind, Keysha Cole
THREE NEW THINGS YOU WANT TO TRY IN THE NEXT 12 MONTHS: 1. Budgeting My Money Better 2. Finishing My Novel 3. Less Time Spent At Work
THREE THINGS YOU WANT IN A RELATIONSHIP (love is a given):1. Honesty 2. Understanding 3. Humor
TWO TRUTHS AND A LIE:1. I snore 2. I like brussel sprouts 3. I chew my tongue when I'm in deep thought
THREE PHYSICAL THINGS ABOUT THE OPPOSITE SEX (or same) THAT APPEAL TO YOU:1. Smile 2. Hands 3. Figure
THREE THINGS YOU JUST CAN'T DO:1. Stop Watching TV 2. Fake being a friend 3. Stop Writing
THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE HOBBIES:1. Writing 2. Reading blogs 3. Seeing live shows
THREE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO REALLY BADLY RIGHT NOW:1. Sleep 2. Sleep 3. Have sex (was that TMI? lol)
THREE CAREERS YOU'RE CONSIDERING:1.Novelist 2. sports columnist 3. Sports Announcer
THREE PLACES YOU WANT TO GO ON VACATION:1. Johannesburg, South Africa 2. Egypt 3. Iceland (I wanna see the midnight sun)
THREE KID'S NAMES--Like I'm gonna have a choice...lol
THREE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO BEFORE YOU DIE:1. Achieve financial freedom 2. Write a book that appears on the New York Tim.es bestseller list 3. Get married and have children

scribbled by Will at 12/10/2004 02:52:00 PM
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12.09.2004

Come, Change...Come

I was born by the river in a little tent
And just like that river I've been running ever since
It's been a long time coming
But I know a change is gonna come, oh yes it will
It's been too hard living, but I'm afraid to die
Cos I don't know what's out there beyond the sky
It's been a long, a long time coming
But I know a change is gonna come, oh yes it will


I've always loved that song by Sam C.ooke, hearing it countless times while visiting my sister's house in the 1980s. It was, ironically, music she listened to while she, well, cooked. And it was probably more than that. It was an anthem of sorts, a song that every person that ever struggled sang from their toes, digging deep to emphasize the part that meant the most to them.

I heard the song on Monday, while watching Spike L.ee's Malcol.m X starring Den.zel Washington. The song played near the end, after watching Malcolm transform from Little to X and after Mecca, into Malcolm "Big", big voice for the voiceless, a man whose thinking went from radical to rational, from 'By Any Means Necessary' to 'Afro American Unity'. He was never flexible in his beliefs, but was instead flexible in his approach. And although he couldn't fully realize his transformation due to his assassination...his change did come.

So that song was appropriate, poignant...indeed, a long time coming.

Just like it is for us. All of us who have to live in metropolitan areas where corruption is the norm, where our kids aren't served their full plate of education, where those who teach are treated with less pay and respect than those who play for a living, where the future of social security isn't secure at all, where the belittling of our women through actions and deeds has never been more blatant.

Come, change. Come.

It's been a long time coming for black men to be treated as equals to their white counterparts, for the number of black men in college to equal and surpass those in correctional facilities. A long time coming for America to stop being the inspiration for reality television, where creativity takes a back seat to just copying the bad news that shows up each night on the news.

It's too hard living in a world that sees war as victory, and sees a moral victory in fighting the wrong wars. Too hard seeing how the world treats the middle class, basically leaving them to fend for themselves, penalizing them for not making more money or less...forcing you to keep running endlessly like a river, forever treading water.

Change, where art thou?

We need you. Not so much the change you get from a dollar bill, but the change that comes from passing bills and legislation to improve the lot of American citizens. Like healthcare, where too many of the people who live here are afraid to get sick because they have no means to pay for care. Care for major things like HIV and AIDS, which studies show infects our beautiful black sisters the most, to seemingly minor things like pinkeye or the flu, which affect us all.

Sam sang about you coming...he says he knew it. He sang it beautifully, so I believed him when he said it. I KNOW you're coming. I just hope that you're not for the worst, Change. I mean, how could you be?

Already, the worlds of music and sports have been exposed for cheating. Musicians and executives and ballplayers taking 'by any means necessary' to a new low. Changes for the worst. Politics is a mess right now, too. Although we all know that it's never been too reliable, anyway.

It's been a rough year. Too many long days and letdowns and losses. Too many laughless moments; too many gray hairs and furrowed brows. Too much shock-ing and awe-ing, too little kissing and hugging. Too many instances where our future leaders--our children--aren't allowed to reach their future potential, just like the leaders of our past.

I would love to see the kinda change that Malcolm-Little-to-X-to-'Big' saw coming. That kinda change that my sister saw coming while basting chicken or steaming greens. That kinda change that makes people dig deep and sing Sam Cooke songs from their toes. The kinda change that will make me want to live and not just afraid to die, but the kind that never lets it even cross my mind. I need to see a change for the better. A change for the best.

I need a change that's poignant, appropriate. Lasting. And I need to see it soon or I just might change my mind about Sam's song.

It's almost 2005. It's been a long time coming, my friend, and I'm tired of running. It'd be great to have something to look forward to...for a change.

Come on...

scribbled by Will at 12/09/2004 04:16:00 PM
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12.08.2004

Hump Day...

See the newest UNDERGROUND installment here...

scribbled by Will at 12/08/2004 10:21:00 AM
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12.07.2004

SHOWing Off...

***Soundtrack--They Don't Know, Jon B., Cool Relax***

One of these days, things are gonna break my way, and I'll be in charge of DVD distribution for old television shows that made people laugh, cry and dance a jig. LOL Maybe one of these days I'll buy the rights to all of the TV shows I grew up watching, and release them to the masses, season by season, month after month. I'd release so many DVDs at one time, it'd look like South Africa after apartheid up in this piece. I guess that's how much I love television, how much of an impact old shows have had on my life...how much I loved growing up in the 70s and 80s.

And while I'm happy for the DVD sets of In.Living Color, The West.Wing and NY.PD B.lue, there are several other shows that could be, nay, SHOULD BE released ASAP. For the love of humanity. Or well, because I love em. I'm no math genius, but come on, how much more money can be had by casting old, past-their-prime actors to recreate their original small screen roles in reunion specials or movies. This...never works. Why?

1. They're old.
2. Nobody wants to see their favorite characters age, because it's never, ever done gracefully (Keisha Knight-Pulliam aside...LOL)
3. They're old.
4. There's almost always a re-cast in the reunion special or movie, someone who's either replaced or added because the original star has gotten too big for such nonsense or to bolster the show with a current star who's on the cusp because the original cast...IS OLD!!!!


Case in point: If they EVER want to do a renunion special for Fresh Prince of Bel-Air, they COULDN'T!!!! Sure, Alfonso Ribeiro will be available (for Silver Sp.oons and In The Ho.use reunions as well...LOL), but would Will Smith even consider it? I mean, and even if he does, what would be the point? They sold the house and moved on their separate ways. Would it be Fresh Prince of Hawaii? Truth is, greed would be the determining factor.

And that sucks. Which leads me to talk about a movie that's coming out December 25 in worldwide release--everywhere except in my mind, that is. I can't even fathom going to see the new FAT ALBERT movie. HUH?!?!?!? WTH?!?!? The trailer has made me vomit on several occasions. I.can't.stomach.it. It's blasphemy...taking such a sacred cartoon and putting it in the hands of the sometimes-funny-but-not-Fat-Albert-material Kenan Thomps.on. Is this how we want to introduce this generation of kids to such a classic cartoon? Can this be stopped? Who do I have to call, petition or sleep with?!?!??!

I love that cartoon. Which leads me into today's list...

SHOWS I'D RELEASE IMMEDIATELY ON DVD IF I WERE IN CHARGE


  • FAT ALBERT & THE COSBY KIDS

(1972-1984) Taken from TVTome.com: Fat Albert & The Cosby Kids was a series about a group of urban adolescents growing up in a Philadelphia neighborhood. The show was based on Cosby's '60s stand up comedy monologues about his childhood. The episodes revolved around the daily life lessons learned by Albert and his friends. Topics ranged from social issues to personal introspection and were blended with humor and music. Among the many great characters that inhabited Fat Albert's world were Rudy, Mushmouth, Donald, Bill, Weird Harold and Russell. In 1979 the show was re-titled The New Fat Albert Show and featured a new segment called The Brown Hornet, a send-up of superhero cartoons starring a larger-than-life African-American crime fighter in outer space.

People, it ran for TWELVE YEARS!!! That's Flintstones and Simpsons territory. How can this not be in households already? There must be some legal snafu that's holding up the release of the signature cartoon of my childhood. This is why I need to be in charge. Seriously. Hell, from the theme song alone, this needs to be done! Remember?

"Hey, hey, hey! It's Fat Albert!"/And I'm gonna sing a song for you/And
Bill's gonna show you a thing or two/You'll have some fun now with me and all
the gang/Learning from each other/While we do our thing Nah, nah, nah -- gonna have a good time (hey, hey, hey!) Nah, nah, nah -- gonna have a good time "This
is Bill Cosby coming atcha with music and fun/And if you're not careful, you may
learn something before it's done! Hey, hey, hey!"/Nah, nah, nah -- gonna have a
good time/Nah, nah, nah -- gonna have a good time/Nah, nah, nah -- gonna have a good time



  • FAME (seeeeee? I couldn't even find a photo on the net to accompany this...OUTRAGEOUS!!!)

(1982-1987) Sure, we all know about Debbie Allen, Janet Jackson and Gene Anthony Ray--all worthy of their own blog posts. But do remember the show? A high school where singing and dancing through the hallways was encouraged, where practicing your tuba was considered a lab class, and where you could seemingly come and go as you please as long as you didn't get caught by Vice Principal Murdoch (the reason why I hate people with red hair to this day...lol)?!?!??! When I got to high school...and NOTHING looked like this...I remember crying my first day. Of course, those tears coulda been due to the school bully depositing my peanut butter sandwich on the ground, but that's a different blog...This was a wartermark for television, especially in the 1980s. Disco was on its way out. The hour drama was getting stale, pre-Hill Street Blues and Miami Vice. There was something missing from TV. And then came FAME!!! I wanna live forever!!!!

This show had it all. Sex appeal (Coco Hernandez, Holly Laird, Nia Peeples); comediennes that could sing like birds (Doris Schwartz); musicians who made it cool to rock poodle hairdos (Bruno Martelli); comedians who were a cross between Tony Danza and Danny Bonaduce (Danny Amatullo); cool teachers (Ms. Grant, Ms. Sherwood & Mr. Sharofsky); and unintentional comedy/some of the most wooden acting this side of a Keanu Reeves screentest (Leroy Johnson, Christopher Donlon and Jesse Velasquez) and even future bad actors like Michael DiLorenzo and Janet). And remember Mrs. Burg?!?!? She was the comedy highlight every week!! How is this not on DVD yet? Somebody get me an outside line!!!

I could go on and on about this show, but I won't. Just know this...another great theme song!!! You know the words...LOL

I have to stop now because, frankly, I've got some phone calls to make. But don't worry...I have a whole month off, which means I'll be back with more priceless TV shows, more pleas, and more useless info that you probably could care less about. Right now, though, if you'll excuse me, I have a fat kid in a red sweater that needs to be stopped.

Hey, Hey, Hey Hell!!! Grrrrr...

scribbled by Will at 12/07/2004 03:42:00 PM
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12.03.2004

Don't BET on it...

So, as I finish up my projects here at work and wrap up all loose ends in preparation for my month-long sojourn to ummm, nowhere (lol), I figured that I would see what's coming on cable during December that will fill my non-work time. And, while perusing the TV Guide, I came across, of course, BET, which is chock full of entertainment options for the holiday season.

Below is a sampling of what's in store for me...

  • Saturday, December 4th--BET's Top 25 Countdown (3:00) with Jade, Brownstone, Oaktown's 3-5-7, En Vogue Episode--Girl Groups Therapy Synopsis: Four girl groups gather to catch up with old group members, show their favorite videos and analyze the stupidity of breaking up in the first place.
  • Sunday, December 5th--BET Original Movie The Lean on Me Reunion: Crazy Joe Comes Home (2004) (2:00) with Morgan Freeman, Joe Budden, Joe Clark, Joe, Fat Joe & Joe Mama Synopsis: What happens when the real Joe Clark and the guy who played him in the movie get together for a reunion at the high school that was the backdrop of it all? Not much, apparently, as this is a BET original production. Watch the Joes play I Declare War, rap perform at the school's prom and auction off the megaphone and bat from the movie.
  • Monday, December 6th--Access Granted: BobKittens (2004) with Bob Johnson, Nelly, Petey Pablo Synopsis: Go behind the scenes with new Charlotte Bobcats owner and former BET honcho Bob Johnson as he & the boys search the strip clubs for members of the Bobcats cheerleading squad, which also serves as the next video from the Nelly CD Suit. Or Sweat. Ahhh, one of em.
  • Tuesday, December 7th--The Parkers (1999) Episode--You Yell, Girl! Synopsis: This is the episode where Nikki yells.
  • Thursday, December 9th--BET Walk of Fame: Omarion (0:20) with IMx, DMX, X-Clan, Wu-Tang Clan, Mario, Gerald Levert (is it a show on BET without Gerald?) and special appearances by Tevin Campbell and Michael Jackson Synopsis: Join BET in this stirring, unprecedented 20-minute special saluting former B2K member Omarion for his contribution to music.
  • Friday, December 10th--BET Movie of the Week: The Five Heartbeats (1991) with Leon, Robert Townsend, Tico Wells, Michael Wright Synopsis: Showing for its 29th time, BET salutes the movie tonight by retiring it from the MotW rotation--until next year.
  • Sunday, December 12th--Bobby Jones Gospel Hour (2:30) Synopsis: BET wheels Jones out on gurney with I.V. for this special recognizing Jones' 88 years on BET. Special appearances by Mary Mary, Aunt Mary, Merry Christmas, Murray from the Odd Couple, and the rev'rend from Brotha Code's CHUHCH post.
  • Wednesday, December 15th--How I'm Livin': Jayson Williams (00:30) Synopsis: Take a trip to the palatial Central New Jersey estate of former NBA star Jayson Williams as he prepares for his second trial in two years. See the pool where grown ass men swam naked while downing tequila straight up. See the gun collection that gave new meaning to Jayson blocking "shots."A portion of the show will be interactive as Williams and his wife sell their furniture and other items on Ebay to cover attorney costs. Exclusively on BET.
  • Thursday, December 16th--106 & Park: The Kwanzaa Special (1:30) Synopsis: See A.J. & Free. See A.J. & Free try and read the teleprompter. See A.J. & Free waste rolls of film trying to pronounce Umoja, Kujichagulia, Ujima, Kuumba...and Nia. LOL
  • Friday, December 17th--BET Original Movie Prison Song 2: It's A Rap (2004) (2:00) with Q-Tip, Fat Joe, Mary J. Blige, Ja Rule, Slick Rick, Shyne, Black Rob, Young Buck, Beanie Sigel and Suge Knight Synopsis: The original cast is reunited for this sequel, which takes place on the same set where the Lean On Me Renunion took place (budgetary reasons?). See your favorite rappers act out their life stories behind bars. Hosted by Blige, who's apparently too happy these days to care that she's surrounded by convicted felons. Lawd.
  • Monday, December 20th--Club Comic View: Christmas Edition Synopsis: Please join host Rickey Smiley as he and 8 other comedians hook up to Santa's sleigh to bring the people something they haven't since Cedric the Entertainer was host--the gift of laughter.
  • Tuesday, December 21st--Soul Food-The Series (2002) Episode--Sitting in the Cardboard Seat Synopsis: This is the episode where the actors deliver their lines with all the emotion of a cardboard cutout.
  • Friday, December 24th--BET Original Programming The First BET Macy Gray Christmas Parade Synopsis: Join Macy Gray, Tamyra Gray, the Grey Goose, A.J. and Tiffany as they putter down Martin Luther King, Jr. Blvd. in Harlem for BET's first ever foray into the parade arena through the world's most famous village. The interactive portion of the show is when callers are able to call in to vote on whether or not the hosts survive the debris being thrown on them by the crowd.
  • Monday, December 27th--Girlfriends (2001) Episode--The Complainer Synopsis: This is the episode where Toni complains.
  • Friday, December 31st--BET/Notarized Top 100 Countdown Synopsis: Well, to tell the truth, there was nothing in the TV Guide for this, but just expect plenty of down souf music, jingling bootys and god-awful rap. Good times!

As you can probably tell after reading all that, I'm sooo looking forward to my time off. Pray for me. Sigh.

scribbled by Will at 12/03/2004 03:36:00 PM
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12.02.2004

5 Things for a Pre-Vacation Thursday...

Ahhh...vacation. Two more days of work and I'm outta here til 2005. God bless the invention of the long weekend, which helped me save some days throughout the year and have it all culminate in a virtual month off. Sometimes...life is good.

Anyways, let's get into the Things for today...

1. First off, I love my fellow bloggers. Only here would I get called out for omitting some cereals from yesterdays Cereal Killer post...LOL Lemme just say that while I didn't mention all of my favorites (I was typing this while working on a Freddy Adu article), I thank those who commented and have to add a few more to my list:





  • Cookie Crisp

Actually, it was Brown Sugar talking about this cereal that started our whole convo yesterday. And when you start waxing nostalgic about cereal and Smurfs, you KNOW the world today is a weird place. LOL Favorite Nightmare brought to my attention that this cereal wasn't on the list and I had to ammend it quickly. Thanks, Bro. Oh, and check out his blog when you get a chance. (Commercial over...LOL)

Oh yeah. The Crisp. Yessirrr!!!! While I also loved the Vanilla wafer flavor, the fact that I was able to eat chocolate chip cookies with milk for breakfast--FOR BREAKFAST!!! Hell, that's like being the first guest up on The Tonight Show with Carson or being first on line to ride the Cyclone on Coney Island. Just great stuff!

  • Apple Jacks

"A is for Apple. J is for Jacks. Cinnamon toasty Apple Jacks..." I loved this cereal so much, I did the Cabbage Patch to the commercial, singing along just like Ruben Studdard probably does when a Duncan Hines commercial comes on. I was like the little kid on the box, doin' cartwheels and stuff. And as I think about it, this is the only orange cereal that I know of. Seriously. How did they make this? And did anyone ever care that this was an orange cereal called APPLE Jacks? God bless Kellogg's once again.

  • Cocoa Puffs

Mannnnn...I rocked ruff and stuff with my Cocoa Puffs!!! LOL And thanks to The Black New Yorker (check out her radio show), who jogged my memory, I can remember plenty a food fight with my niece as we sat down on school mornings trying to make each other laugh. One Cocoa Puff to the dome would do it every time. And the commercial? A sedate, squealing cuckoo bird, trying to keep it together like he was in AA or something...and then he just loses it! This...was classic TV!

  • Froot Loops

Good ole Toucan Sam. Gotta love him. His beak...was the colors of the cereal. And again...who made it? Altogether now: KELLOGG'S. (I better get some free cereal from plugging them so much...shiiii.) Whenever I saw that red box coming out of the grocery bags, I knew there were good times to follow. Give me some clarity, though. Was this the commercial that said, "Just follow my nose...it always knows..." If it was, then I remember things that I probably shouldn't. Scary. But I still loved this stuff. And again with the spelling, though. How many kids have gone to school over the years spelling fruit like froot? Can we look this up? There has to be evidence.

OK, I gotta stop with all this cereal talk. People might think I'm going a little COO COO!!! LOL

2. Does anyone watch LOST? This is a great show, but you have to watch every week to figure out the psyche of the people stranded on an island in the South Pacific. And it's about to get really good, because the 40 or so castaways are about to find out that they're not alone on the island. *Cue scary music.*

3. And while I'm on the subject of television, please, please, please watch The West Wing this season. I know I've mentioned it in my blogs before, but let me tell you...this show continues to hold my attention. And I'm not your biggest politico. It's a bit talky (which I love) and the writing is superb (which I love even more). The show fell off for about a season and a half, but it's back to its original brilliance. At least that's the way I see it.

4. Yolie, I know you won by default the other day in the I Know What You Did Last Week post. But it's cool, though. You shouted me out on your blog AND made reference to the "stepping awayyyyy from the tracks", so you deserve the tiger pops. LOL

5. And finally, I won't bore you with my thoughts about the black coach at Notre Dame getting shafted after just three seasons OR the news that Jason Giambi, a New York Yankee, admitted to injecting steriods. All I will say is that this world--the one I was given, I didn't make it--is starting to depress me more each day. Sigh.


scribbled by Will at 12/02/2004 11:19:00 AM
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12.01.2004

Cereal Killer

***Soundtrack--Stop Turning Me On, New Edition, Bad Boy's Greatest R&B Hits***

So I was chatting with Brown Sugar today. Lovely young lady. We laughed about both of our last posts and, when discussing hers--which was all about old school cartoons--I told her she took me back, wayyyy back.

And then...the subject switched to cereal. One of my most favorite subjects in the whole wide world. Really. No, you don't understand. I could sit here and rattle off every line from every cereal commercial that was made back in the 70s and 80s.

THAT'S how much I love cereal.

So today, in the midst of allll the work I have to do before I go on vacation next week, in spite of all the projects that need to be completed by Friday, yes, putting all of that aside, right now, I will systematically do a break down of my favorite cereals from childhood. I.love.this.



  • Frosted Flakes

The absolute KING of the cold cereal. The sweet cousin of Corn Flakes, nothing beat indulging in the sweet, soggy flakes while Smurfing on the living room floor on Saturday morning. By the way, where in the hell did they come up with the idea for Tony the Tiger, one of the most underrated cereal salesmen of our time. I mean, he wore a scarf with his name embroidered on the side, like he was ahead of his time. I mean, this was way before Laverne wore the L, before Fonzie's leather jacket, even before Scheinder and his rolled up sleeve on One Day At A Time. He is, for all intents and purposes, a watershed character and I, for one, would like to give his creator, Kellogg's, their props. Seriously, they're like the Walt Disney of cereal.

Ok, Ok...you know you were waiting for it, so I'll say it. I'm not ashamed. THEY'RE GRRRRRREATTTT!!!

  • Cap'n Crunch

Wooo boy! A close second to Frosted Flakes, and I mean a CLOSEsecond. The little nuggets of corny goodness shaped like treasure chests, taking on milk like a life preserver while retaining its crunchiness--for a while. And aye, there's the rub. If you left it in the milk for too long (like I did), the crunch would fade like a bad haircut and the "Crunch" would get stuck in your teeth. Which, in case you were wondering, was STILL not a bad thing. And I actually wrote this next sentence today while chatting with Sugar:

"I loved Crunch Berries. They were like Crunch PLUS!"

WTF? She musta had me caught up in the nostalgia...LOL I did love 'em, though. All that the original had, plus a crazy looking creature on the box, and that berry goodness! Oh, GOOD TIMES!!!! And what's up with Quaker Oats spelling the word Captain like Cap'n? Didn't they know kids were impressionable and would lose spelling bees for misspelling the word based on their love of the Crunch? Didn't they know that kids, at age 5, will ALWAYS take the easy way out and spell words the easiest way possible?!?!? Somebody needs to investigate this.

  • Super Golden Crisp

What can you say about the Bear? First of all, what you can definitely say is that he was black. Negro. African American. Whatever. He was a Brother Bear. And the cereal, sort of like crack today, was addictive. Sure, they resembled black eye peas (seeeee? BLACK PEOPLE FOOD!!!) and the bear sang like he was straight out of a smoked-out jazz club. His name was SUGAR BEAR, for crying out loud!!! But I loved it! This was actually on the Post web site: Post Golden Crisp was the first ever sweetened cereal. Sugar Bear, the Post Golden Crisp cereal spokescharacter, was introduced in 1963 wearing his familiar blue sweater. Sugar Bear's favorite food is a delicious box of Post Golden Crisp cereal. Just ask and he will tell you that he "can't get enough of that Post Golden Crisp."

After that paragraph, there's nothing left for me to type. LOL

  • Cheerios

WHAT?!?!?! General Mills up in the hizz-ouse! LOL Come on, if you were a kid living ANYWHERE in America, at some point there was a box of Cheerios in your cabinet. Alone, the little oats would clash with milk, making kids around the globe chaffe each time their parents busted it out. In fact, if you were like me, you would play with the oats instead of eat them, even, embarrassingly enough, shoot them out of your nose at your sibling...LOL However, if and when you had Cheerios, if you put just the right amount of sugar on them (read: half the container), those things tasted like oaty sunshine!!! All that, and it lowers cholesterol, too?!?!?! Shiiii...pass the O's like ya used ta do...

  • Lucky Charms

This is taken straight from the General Mills web site: "Theyre always after me Lucky Charms!" A favorite for more than four decades, delicious Lucky Charms cereal features frosted oats and colored marshmallows. Lucky the Leprechaun creates the marshmallow shapes – hearts, moons, stars, clovers, horseshoes, pots of gold, rainbows and red balloons – with his rainbow magic. While kids love the taste, parents are happy that Lucky Charms is fortified with 12 vitamins and minerals, and is a good source of calcium. It's magically delicious!

**blank stare**

Why did we like this stuff again? I wouldn't eat it now, even if someone was torturing me for the secrets to my mama's fried chicken. But back then, back in the day, this stuff tasted like candy in a bowl. I liked it. I can admit it. But not as much as I liked...

  • FrankenBerry

Man oh man. I can still remember going to the store with my parents and asking, nay, demanding that we bring this cereal home. It was oats and marshmallow-type pieces that fit into this tasty puzzle. It was strawberry. It was candy. It was a berry symphony. This...is General Mills' greatest creation to date. Some would say that Count Chocula was better, but not for my money. Orrr my parents' money. LOL

And last, but certainly not least...You gotta love...

  • Rice Krispies

The cereal that talked to you?!?!?! Has there ever been an cerealic equal?!?!? Sure, Snap and his boys were more gay than Rosie O'Donnell at a NOW rally, but who cared? Back then, gay meant happy. And my cereal talking to me made me happy. And ya know, I can see that Snap was a chef, ala the hat. But what in da hell were Crackle and Pop? Were they the Miracles to Snap's Smokey Robinson? Were they rejects from the Seven Dwarfs? Was Kellogg's overstepping its Disney boundaries? As you can see, years later, I'm still full of questions. And if you listen really carefully, put your ear next to the bowl, somewhere that cereal is talking to you with an answer. Just once...just ONCE those little rice thingys coulda given me the answers to my math test. Well, OK. Maybe not.

As you can see, I could go on and on about my favorite cereals. And really, that's about all I can do. Because now that I've reached my 30s, the days of enjoying Kix or Trix or Rice Chex or Raisin Bran are allll behind me. Nope, no more can I have my way with Honeycomb or savor my Fruity or Cocoa Pebbles. Not the way I used to, anyway. Nope. Lactose intoleration has changed everything. Sure, every once in a while I'll splurge, pick up some soy milk from the local Associated and get busy with some Oatmeal Crisp.

But I'll have to be alone when I do it. Or else, like those misunderstood souls who get sent to prison unjustly, I will be known to whomever is around as...the Cereal Killer.

Somebody, anybody...light a candle...LOL


scribbled by Will at 12/01/2004 04:42:00 PM
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Mind Droppings

I write entirely to find out what I'm thinking, what I'm looking at, what I see and what it means. What I want and what I fear. (Joan Didion)



The Write One


Will. Lefty. Since Summer 1971.
Over the next six months, I'll be saying some hellos, some goodbyes. Living, laughing, growing. Don't.miss.a.word.
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